Baby, It's Cold Outside

     The old song, “Baby, it’s Cold Outside” sung by Louis “Satchmo” Armstrong with the great Ella Fitzgerald still rings in my ears as the sun begins to warm things up here in the mountains.

            The cold weather has created a lot of serious problems, but there is humor here and there amidst the ice.  My neighbor George claims that his dog lifted his leg on its favorite tree and got stuck when his glorious stream instantly froze, immobilizing the poor dog with one leg dangling in the air. George says he ran outside and broke the bond with a stick, but then again, old George does exaggerate when he drinks.

            What is actually true and more humorous is the fact that a shipload of global warming scientists, mostly Australians, went to Antarctica in a Russian ship to confirm their theory that the polar ice cap was being depleted due to global warming. 

            Expecting to see sweating penguins covered in sunscreen, they found themselves frozen in an ice cube. This happened on Christmas Eve.  Thanks to a cadre of rescue penguins with little kegs of brandy tied around their necks, those brilliant scientists survived long enough to call for help. 

            The sympathetic Chinese sent an icebreaker to break them loose, but it got stuck too. There were plenty of penguins, but not enough brandy.  The Chinese settled for hot tea and took their turn at calling for help.

            The good old U.S.A. then sent a coastguard icebreaker, called the Polar Star, rushing to the scene and, after about two weeks faced with the chill of reality, the global warming guys were freed from the unexpected expanding ice of Antarctica.   You can’t make this stuff up.

            The irony of that event seems to have been lost on the main stream media.  It doesn’t fit their template, but for the rest of us, this event provided a good laugh.  Have you noticed that the buzz word has been changed from “global warming” to “climate change?”  Interesting.

            The fact that the earth’s climate has been in flux since the beginning of time, won’t inhibit the zeal of those who believe that insignificant little bipeds, crawling around on a small planet, have more influence on the earth’s climate than volcanic activity, solar events, and the massive power of nature. 

            Ever notice that when you haven’t talked to a friend for a while, the conversation sometimes starts with the weather.  I guess I fell into that trap, because Gayle accidently erased the article I had written for this post and I wanted to get something out there today.  So how’s the weather?

            On a serious and belated note, I hope 2014 is a good year for you and don’t worry about the penguins.  They’re doing fine.  The global warming scientists left suntan lotion and tiny dark glasses for them - just in case.